Every morning, without fail, Tenley (our dog) wakes me up at about 6. He is ready for our 4 mile run. So off we go to greet the day, reduce his energy level and increase mine. Once home, I feed both dogs, then I go to get my "morning smile".
Sometimes Mom is already awake and smiling, other times I wake her up to get my smile and my favorite is when I stand at the side of her bed, very quiet. Her eyes are still closed and she knows that I am there and I get the smile. Love it!
Then I help her get out of bed and take her to the kitchen for her first can of tube feeding for the day. Smiling the whole time!
I am always so struck by the fact that Mom has been through so much and yet, can still have so much joy. She inspires me. I have had a hard time resolving that God would let this happen. Yes, I know in my head that He is good and loving and we live in a fallen world - but please, why Mom & Dad. My heart is having a hard time understanding. They are truly the best people I know, so healthy all their lives. They enjoyed marathons and gyms and I don't think we ever had white bread or chips in our house.
My parents have always been strong, patient, consistent guides for me in life. How desperately I miss that. How I long to be able to trust that the Lord is the one I need to look to. I know that this was their example, but . . .
Shelby, this is amazing. You are doing such a wonderful job with this blog! I'm so glad that you got the pictures up- they add so much. I love it~
ReplyDeleteShelby, this is a beautiful and raw insight to your life. Thank you for sharing the beauty in trials. God will sustain you. PS. I agree...your moms smile shows a joy that I have never seen before.
ReplyDeleteWe love you both.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Shelby, for sharing so honestly. I appreciate your vulnerability. (Trust can't happen without such things. Meanwhile, we'll keep trusting for you.)
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